You don't need to react to everything.

Well to date I've published 10 albums, and I pride myself in that. And right now I'm working on multiple ones and each one of them are completely different genre wise, energywise. Everything is so different. I mean like one I don't I don't really want to spoil my albums but they are completely different. Okay. And album thing is new to me. I I always worked on albums one by one. you know, inspiration hit me and it just, you know, kept on coming in one direction and after I would, [music] you know, collect everything and polish everything, then, you know, the next one will come. But these past months, it's been crazy. like everything is rushing and it's like I can't keep up with my own brain and I'm still learning how to navigate that, you know, and how [music] to handle that. But it's been more difficult than I thought. And I actually started the new year believing that I would only publish two albums. And you know, like maybe six singles that are separate from the albums. But the way everything is going again, I can feel [music] everything rushing and I'm so excited to share all of that. Yeah. But still there is one album that I'm struggling with. Well, actually two albums. One is I intended to be an EP, but I don't know how many tracks it'll end up having. But yeah, one is really happy and it is chill and it is simple and it is light. At least [music] that's the concept that I have for the album. So it [music] is everything that I've never made in one track. You know, if you look back at all of my works, you could see irony in it and longing and onesided. So many one-sided feelings and betrayal and anger and feelings like that. So to have one single album that's, you know, not that is new and I'm still I still don't know how to manage that. And the second one is actually what I thought I would share this video for. And that one actually again that one started based on this concept that I'm sure so many of you have experienced. You know sometimes you choose well you all have pattern different patterns for dealing with anything life grief happiness or whatever and >> this album >> actually started when you see someone you know I'm trying to generalize this but Maybe I shouldn't. >> I'm going to say exactly what happened >> for me personally and then you can take take it however you want. >> So >> I recognized a pattern of mine is hanging on to the idea of someone and it it was a pattern. It wasn't a specific someone. It was a pattern. So when you know when I had a crush on this person and then at the end of the day I feel like I don't even know how it would come to an end because nothing would happen but it would come to an end and then I would pick someone else and someone else and someone else and it was it was a vicious cycle and even a couple of times You know, when I would put someone aside, I would look back to my rank of other people who came after that person for me and I would try to bring that idea back. So, it was completely unhealthy. And then the year 2025, it was It was the very first neutral year that I've had because I recognized that and I didn't try to replace anyone. [music] 2025 was the very first year where I was completely on my own. And I didn't even intend for it to be like that. It just was. And I was completely at peace with it. But I also feel like I was so preoccupied with whatever [music] is going on internally that I didn't even have time to, you [music] know, create this idea and this concept around someone to keep me, I don't know, active romantically. And remember the keyword is idea. So I wouldn't just pick someone and then build around them. I would take the idea of them because you know ideas you would think that the idea cannot hurt you because it's not real life. but it can actually damage you worse. So 2025 being the very first year that I was completely okay with not having that and I just noticed that like 3 days ago. I didn't even notice anything changing. And then, you know, the whole cliche of new year, new me. I I was taking a look at people that I've been following and I noticed this one person and I feel like this person has the potential of triggering all of my old systems, which was to see potential, clank to the potential. fall in love with the potential and then get hurt. And it was actually like his his activities are completely okay and they're completely like aligned. But he posted this um this couple of photos, you know, like many people have done of welcoming the new year. And especially one of them really um freaked me out because I felt a sense of jealousy because of one of those photos and I did not like that. And all of the best wishes to that person and all of the people in their lives and it's not, you know, it's not on that person, it's on me. But even though I really appreciated what this person is doing, I put this distance because I don't want to go back to that cycle. And you know, just because I don't want to go back to that cycle doesn't mean that I can not turn it into more art because that's forever going to be my coping mechanism with life. making music, writing about it is it has always been there and it is always going to be there because no matter what emotions I feel whether it's love or anger or sadness or happiness or joy and all of these different feelings, music is the way that I choose to express them and it's what eases And then, you know, more stuff started coming up. Even though I'm not a big fan of social media and I don't like doom scroll, but whenever I come up to, you know, check or share or upload something new. I see little parts and they are all happy couples. And I guess one of the, you know, the healing process is also grief. And I don't even know what I'm healing from. I I guess it's the unhealthy cycle and the old me and the grief of letting have of letting go of having to let go of a certain cycle. I guess that's it. But again, another one video of this couple like talking about what they got each other for Christmas. It made me cry and you know these all of these different thoughts which is completely funny to me right now and it was even funny to me at the moment of you know getting emotional and being like I'm going to die alone. I'm I'm completely alone in this. And yes, so even though the album started with that concept of me putting distance between myself and that specific person who looks like they are completely aligned with the kind of you know people that I would want to have around me. So yeah, there's putting this in because it triggers old habits and then there's this sense of dying alone and I don't think we should say that on here of being alone our entire lives and all of these fears of failing. And to me, even though I have so many like self-discovery songs, psychological songs, uh you could call them, but that album again, I wanted it to be short, but I think it's going to be a longer than what I intended because I feel like that sadness of seeing Well, happiness and sadness of staying happy couples which is even progress because you know I used I I didn't I didn't feel anything before but now at least you know I'm feeling something. So that's progress instead of numbing I'm feeling, which is another thing that you will find in another album. Now, when will each of these come out? >> I shouldn't say it, >> I think, but I have one. No, no, I'm not going to say it because I don't know which season they would fall into. I'm still discussing that >> and I haven't completely decided. Although there is one album that I'm sure of the release date, but I did not talk about that album right now. And yeah, it's it's scary, but I think it's kind of fun. I'm going to make it fun. >> [music] >> You know, you can't I don't enjoy being sappy or sad all the time. And I'm a much happier person than my lyrics. You know, a lot of people listen to my songs and they're like, "Who hurt you?" I'm like, I I promise I'm a very I'm I'm a happy person in real life. I'm way more fine than you might think. But I'm also glad that my new music is changing that narrative and isn't just really uh a really confused emotionally confused girl sitting in the corner. Now, even when I am confused, I'm going to I'm going to make you hear it, I think. And yeah, I think I'm taking the irony. I'm putting it to a better use. And you're going to hear about that in all of my well, yeah, all of my upcoming works. And If you felt any of these feelings or the ones that you will hear more about in the songs, I hope you had a good time of just sitting still with [music] them. You don't need to react to everything. Just let the feelings come and go like ocean waves and you'll be okay. Thank you friends.